Prone to wonder Lord I feel it.
When I hear a really good song . I …like…want my body to erupt. Like seriously
Strangely I just felt the urge to return to a very unhealthy relationship that drove me to a very dark and broken place at the end of last year but by God’s love, grace, and mercy I was rescued :-) I partially wanted to revisit it because I knew that I would be able to “feel” something. Lately, I haven’t been “feeling” that much which without understanding I concluded to be a bad thing..The simple fact is I like to feel , we all like to feel no matter what time of feeling that is…it makes us feel real (because we are carnal). But, i can’t go back there, so much was wrong with that relationship because God was not glorified, my feelings were. He wants me to know him and at the time i was not attempting to know him because I knew that If I really got to know God I would have to stop my sin. I can’t go back to a place where I cannot know my father. The whole time I was trying to hide from an all-seeing, all-knowing God. Because of my sin. I was overflowing with confusion and severely lacking discipline and wisdom. I don’t want to feel that. I don’t want to hide. I want to be in the light . I want him to see me do his work. Might is the work of his hands!
As I was studying the word yesterday in First Peter I came across this verse…
"As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as he who called you is holy , you also be holy in all your conduct." (I Peter 1:14-15 ESV)
Therefore, I have faith in holiness and not in my former ignorance or feelings. I faith in the fruit of the spirit and not the works of the flesh.
"For to set the mind on the flesh is death but, to set the mind on the spirit is life and peace." (Romans 8:6)
My mind is no longer on the flesh but on the spirit. My mind is on things above. I have faith in that alone. So NO! I will not conform to the passions of my former ignorance. God’s divine power has granted me everyone that pertains to life and godliness because I know him! Knowing him is life. That life is abundant. I will enjoy this abundant life with my father.
"And this is eternal life, that they know you the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom you have sent." (John 17:3)